Talk:Inventing 2!/@comment-26434802-20150414010329


 * Ahem* I must turn into Henry for a brief moment to review this...

The first part is as gory as the first one was, which is always a good thing. More gore means more descriptive which also means better grammar which means longer story! Nya ha! I rate this part a 8/10

Now for the second part though... It's... Pretty meh... Like Ferry said in chat eariler, it just doesn't flow. Going straight from instructions to a phone call, just is weird. I rate this section a 3/10, for not flowing correctly, and quite a few grammar issues scattered throughout.

I rate the story as a whole 7/10, the second part is dragging down the first in making it bad. The original version was better, imo. Nya ha!

Henry out!