The White Series
The first series in the show, complete with 6 5-minute episodes
Starting Theme: An excerpt from The Spanish March by Johann Strauss II.
Ending Theme:Body Movin' by Beastie Boys.
Announcer: A long time ago, in a far away region of ManInBlack007JK's detemented mind, he created OCs for a good, but terribly milked horror game called Five Nights At Freddy's. And today, they are all moving into a mansion together. Get your scotch, gentlemen: you're gonna need it because your crazy, hot girlfriend likes this stuff.
Camera cuts to Lindsay and Yellow Guy, unpacking things into a room.
Lindsay pulls out a female school uniform from a box, gasping. "I remember this! This was when I used to fight witches!" She says, excited. "Umm..what?" Yellow asks.
"Oh, nothing...." She replies. As she sifts through clothing, she names outfits, such as a wrestling costume, a 'Gone With The Wind' dress, a steampunk outfit, etc. Yellow gets progressively angry, eventually yelling, "How much of a life have you not told me about!?" Lindsay smiles, saying, "Enough of one to make you angry, so, not much." Smirking, Yellow says, "Put on that school outfit if you want to make me happy."
Announcer: Lindsay, you are about to have a very uncomfortable night of switching between attempted murder and forced stripping...
Camera cuts to Alex, walking through a hallway.
"Everything is so big...Can't find a damn thing in this place." Alex sighs, eventually finding 3 doors, all marked 'Bathroom'. "Ah, finally!" He says, walking into one. He instantly gets thrown out, Lindsay yelling, "Ocupada, bandito!" Alex, rubbing his head, and muttering, "Crazy bitch..." walks into another bathroom, getting tazed once the door is opened.
"Knock!" Rosette yells, waving her arm from the door of the bathroom. Alex groggily gets up, almost sobbing, and walks into the third one, it being seemingly empty. "Oh, thank you, God...." Alex says, laughing. The door slowly shuts itself, Amity revealed to be behind the door, looking at Alex, smiling and giggling crazily.
Announcer: What the heck is wrong with her?...Camera zooms on Amity's hand, holding a 50 Shades Of Grey book....Oh god, Alex, run!
Amity tackles Alex, the both of them landing in a bathtub in the back of the room. As the two start having sex, Ylviere walks up to the bathroom, oblivious of the situation. She walks in, saying "What's that noi-" before screaming and seeing the two.
Camera cuts to Lindsay trying to comfort Ylviere, who is crying with her head in her hands.
Faceless Sam looks at her. "I don't understand. I thought Lindsay was your daughter, Miss Ylviere, and you have to have....y'know, to have a kid." Lindsay looks at him, sighing. "She has only seen animated sex." Deadbear looks at her angrily. "Then how were you made!?"
"Chloroform!" Ylviere yells before sobbing. Deadbear looks at Ylviere, creeped out, then hears Amity and Alex again. "Disgusting...." He sighs. "Yellow and I should try that!" Lindsay says, excitedly.
Katherine walks up to the door and hears the commotion in the bathroom. "Amity?.....Y'know what? Good for her."
Announcer: The first night at the new home! We can't use sex though, since we used it all in the first episode. The moment is gone. Curse you, 50 Shades!
Camera cuts to Lindsay, Yellow, and Testy sleeping in a bed together.
"Thanks for letting me sleep with you two!" Testy says. "I get scared that Scott Cawthon is going to get me in my sleep!" Lindsay shrugs and says, "It's fine. Just.....Keep away from Yellow. He's kinda lustful right now..."
Yellow is seen shaking in the far right side of the bed, with Lindsay and Testy next to him. "I'm not thinking about that, Linds!" He says, happily. Suddenly, he grabs the sheets of the bed, grits his teeth and whispers, "I'm thinking about us together and me inside so hard your brains explode..."
"I told you not to take that Cialis." Lindsay shrugs before the lights are turned off by Ylviere. "Miss Ylviere!" Testy says. "Can you read us one of your stories?"
She happily gets one out and answers, "Sure!"
Announcer: One story the admins of this wiki want to hear for perverted reasons later...
"As the girl lay there, innocent and willing, she began to wonder where exactly the dynamite went inside her...That's a good place to leave off." Ylviere reads before leaving. All of the three in the bed are fast asleep.
Camera cuts to Amity, sleeping.
"I wish that 50 Shades book didn't make me go crazy...Oh well. At least it's not that yellow fellow." Amity thinks. The camera goes in a POV of the girl, showing her turn off the light and fall asleep. After 10 seconds, her eyes open to find Yellow on top of her, the camera zooming out to show her screaming.
Amity and Yellow running are heard in the background as Flesh is going to bed. Scott Cawthon walks into the room, asking, "Where is Testy's bedroom?". Flesh answers 2 doors down when Scott asks, "I'm getting paid for this, right?"
"Oh, yes. Definitely." Flesh says.
Announcer: People say something's were meant to be. Our TV networks don't think we were meant to be though. Neither was this.
Camera cuts to Yellow and Mariah playing Cards Against Humanity.
Mariah smiles and reads the black card; "Nothing is worse than..." Yellow plays a card, saying, "A dead sister and no inheritance from her." Mariah looks in anger and slaps him. "Mean. But, pretty funny! I have the best card though!" She says, about to play the card when Chef, on camera, slips and the cake he made calls ontop of the game.
Mariah sighs and yells, "Chef, you made me waste MY GOOD FUCKING CARD!" Amity peeks in, looking in horror at the mess and Chef on the ground. "They know I just cleaned the floors!" She runs behind the couch, everyone wondering who it was. "A Green haired girl just ran in front of us...But no one like that lives here!" Mariah says.
Announcer: On the contrary, Amity, they don't know you exist.
Amity sighs in relief. "Okay..." Lindsay smiles and runs at the sound of the doorbell. "I ordered a pizza! You guys like Flesh and Pepperoni, right?" The guest of the episode, Xavier Munroe, is revealed to be at the doorway. "19.50, Lindsay! Oh, and don't ask about the pizza.." Xavier says. Lindsay looks worried. "I'm flat broke! I spent my money on steamy indie games!" She thinks.
"I can't pay..." Lindsay sighs. Xavier shrugs. "I don't really need this job. You can pay in another way..." He smiles, sexy music in the background.
Announcer: Oh god...
Camera cuts to Lindsay and Xavier having a cup of tea together. Mariah and Yellow are still playing, and Amity is seen hiding behind the couch.
Announcer: Oh. Okay. Cool, I'll join. *sipping is heard*
Lindsay suddenly realizes something. Wait...Xavier is the pizza guy...we almost made love, before the TV network advised to lay off the sex....He has a wife....OH GOD! HE IS A SEX WITCH! She thinks. She rips apart her outfit to reveal her schoolgirl outfit, and she runs at Xavier with magic in her hands, resulting in him calmly shooting her.
Announcer....Cue Cutting Crew: Deuce Ex Machina.
Announcer: Great literature comes from within. Wether it be your mind, your heart, or in Ylviere's case, your genitals.
Ylviere and Lindsay are reading a new comic.
"I like the subtlety!" Lindsay says, happily. Ylviere nods and looks at her. "I tried to make the parking ticket
symbolize something as it enters him." She smiles. As that happens, the camera goes to Amity, above them in a closet. The 50 Shades book is in the middle of a demonic circle.
Announcer: Is this really a plot device in our show?...Okay. Continue.
Amity mutters, "Turn off....Turn off...TURN OFF....", in attempt to banish the demonic book, when a devil flies out of, snickering evilly. He grabs Ylviere's book and runs off into a portal, much to Lindsay and hers anger. They chase after the devil, eventually ending up in an office where he works.
The Devil reads the comic and laughs. "You call this, off switch, hentai!?"
Announcer: *gasps* An off switch...the worst insult to a coming writer!
Ylviere grabs her pen and says, "That was just a start. A writing contest. I win, I get a pen made of gold...You win, you get my soul!" The Devil looks confused. "A pen made of?...Nevermind, I accept!" He cackles. Suddenly, a band joins in, playing this:
Ylviere, grab your pen and write things and get hard!
Because hell's broken loose at the house and the Devil deals at heart!
And if you win, you get this shiny pen made of gold!
But if you loose, the Devil gets your sooouuuulllllll!
The band keeps playing, until the two read each other's comics: Devil, with 50 Shades Of Grey 2, and Ylviere with an untitled one. Once done, the Devil falls over.
Announcer: Cause of death? His organs were steamed from the inside out. Ylviere wins!
"Devil, just come back if you wanna try again! I done told you once, you son of a bitch, I'm the best there had ever been!" Ylviere sings. The song plays instead of the typical ending theme, and the episode ends.
Announcer: Definition of Mary-Sue; A self insert or overly powerful and perfect character. Of course, since when were we here to tell good stories?
.*A grey-skinned man in a black tuxedo, with glasses walks in, everyone looking at him.*
Announcer: Ladies and gentleman, ManinBlack, creator of everything you are reading right now...*cough*exceptforeverything*cough*
"Hello, everyone!" Manin cheerfully says. "I'm your landlord! So, I'm just here for my rent!" Everyone nods, with Chef, Blacky, and others thanking him before The Chef realizing something. I spent all of our money....on...food....
Announcer: Now, what you may not know, is that Chef has a very weird fetish about food, so he loves any kind of food. He recently had a date with a pomegranate, and things aren't going well...
Deadbear, bowing in respect of Manin, goes and looks in a vault, finding nothing. He instantly grabs Lindsay and yells, "HOW MANY PORNOGRAPHIC INDIE GAMES HAVE YOU DOWNLOADED!?"
Lindsay screams, saying, "One!...Ok, Six, but I didn't spend much!"
Announcer: Yes, Deadbear, the aumount totaled is 69 cents.
Deadbear drops her, surprised. "Oh. How unusual." Manin laughs and says, "That's the kind of humour I pay you for, Announcer...But I need my money. Truth be told, I just need a vending machine."
Cecilia perks up. Before dramatically yelling, "CECILIA TO THE RESCUE!" In a freeze-frame shot, with the Announcer commenting that he would watch an anime staring Ceclia, for more than 10 reasons. She smiles and says, "I know a guy."
Sodapop The Bartender, plugged into Manin's house and disgruntled, has Manin take a soda from him. "Thanks!" He says happily. Soda mutters, "Okay, you grey-skinned anon..."
"WE FIND THAT OFFENSIVE!" Manin yells, turning to Soda angrily.
Announcer: Ah, spy movies....Gadgets, girls, and gallivanting action. But for this show, it's mostly girls. In intercourse.
Camera cuts to Balloon Broken and Cecilia, going over files in an office. Ballon notices Blacky's office, where he is missing. "By God....where is he?" BBro asks. Cecilia sighs and says, "Probably drinking whiskey and making out with Haruka..."
Camera cuts to Blacky and Haruka, doing exactly what Cecilia said they were doing.
Blacky gets a call, answering with, "Yeeeeelllo?" Cecilia yells in anger on the other line, "WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!" Blacky's eyes narrow. "Definitely not making out with Harukia and drink..ing..." He says, looked at a naked hologram of Cecilia and a bottle of champagne. He yells into the phone, "YOU DONT KNOW ME!"
Cecilia sighs and tells him to hurry and take up a target; Blacky mistakes it for "Take out", so he grabs a gun as Haruka puts back on her holographic clothes. Blacky. after driving for a while and singing "Just A Friend", he encounters a man in a suit, the target.
Cecilia knows he misheard, and she yells at him to stop after he shoots someone; the target is revealed to be alive, but something was hit. Right when Cecilia asks, Lindsay falls over with a hole in her head, a la Deuce Ex Machina.
Cecilia sighs and whispers, "God. Damnit. Blacky."
Announcer: I had angels planned for this....
An angel choir plays in the background.
Announcer: Oh, really? Now?